Vanity?

With me, from the earliest days of viewing my cross dressed self in the mirror, I dedicated myself to improving my “look” as much as possible. In fact, anytime I had the chance, I was practicing. It sure beat the time I had to spend in my boring boy clothes and crew cut haircuts. I couldn’t wait for the day I could purchase my own wig and better yet, grow my own hair out.

Of course, as the years advanced I grew “into” my feminine vanity and it became part of my existence. I guess more than a few feminists could say the whole process is part of societies’ method of subjugating women as a whole to unfair standards of beauty.

Since to a large part, I got such a late start to living a full time existence as a trans woman, I still feel the newness of the whole process.

In many ways, my bodily changes due to hormone replacement therapy have helped increase my vanity to new heights. For example, after I pulled my leggings on this morning, I noticed my thighs were increasing in size due to the redistribution of fat in my body. By now, I know you are thinking wow how mundane is that but it gets worse. With all the problems in the world, I notices one of my thighs seems to be bigger than the other. Of course I have heard of the relatively common occurrence of women’s breasts being different sizes, which is a problem I don’t have.

I wonder now, as I approach another appointment with my endo doc in the middle of this month, I am going to discuss with her the possibility of me moving my Estradiol transmission method from patches to injections. The injections I have heard are the most effective way of achieving the best femininizing results. Realistically, I am not expecting much more in my breast development but would like to see more in my hips.

Even though I have not decided which direction I will take (depending on what she says) I am leaning towards the injections.

I guess vanity will probably get the best of me again.