Many years ago during my years of searching for my true gender self, I spent many hours and days being a victim of my circumstances. In other words, I felt sorry for myself wanting to follow a feminine path in life.
Primarily, thanks to input I received from my second wife, I began to pull myself out of the victim category and accept the way I felt. My wife kept telling me I didn’t know anything about being a woman (which I didn’t) so I needed to find out what she meant because she was not offering any help. Sadly it wasn’t until many years later following her passing away, did I learn what she meant. Obviously, since she can not speak for herself, I think she was expanding on the times when she called me “The pretty pretty princess.” Those were the days when I obsessed on how I looked as a cross dresser and not how I felt as a novice transgender woman. Had I not been so narrow minded in my quest for femininity, I think now I would have spent way less time feeling sorry for myself. Why couldn’t I have hobbies such as golf rather than dressing as a woman.
My life turned out to be a double edged sword about that time. Not only was I facing pressure on the home front to learn more about the basics of being a woman, at work through promotion after promotion, I was feeling increased pressure to perform there also. To help me along, the many managerial training sessions…
