Member-only story
For the longest time I resisted the idea there were two of me. A male and a female side.
The further I went in completing a MtF gender transition, the more obvious it became I did indeed have two sides to my being. I had a male side I needed to desperately protect to even exist in the world as I knew it and a feminine side. I worked hard to cover any signs I was feminine at all and for the most part all my efforts were successful. Through my love of attempting to play sports and work on fast cars, I was able to hide.
One way or another hiding became impossible as I gained confidence in trying to head out of my dark lonely gender closet and explore the world. The whole process was very scary yet exciting and my feminine self turned out to be exceedingly patient and giving with the process. She stood by as I grew through my teenaged cross dressing years and managed to arrive at a place where I could at least blend in with the public the best I could.
Then, she stood by me in my communication years when I took on the world one on one as a transgender woman. Looking back she most likely knew the truth. If she bided her time, she would win eventually and be able to fully take over my life. Taking all of that into consideration I found as she was taking over, she had always been the best part of me. My parents had always tried to raise me with a strong moral…
