Member-only story
Perhaps the most important and the most fragile accessory we can add as a transgender woman or trans man is the confidence to be ourselves. Positivity gives us the power to move forward on our gender paths.
In my case, confidence was hard earned and still remained very difficult to hold on to. The problem was it seemed as if every step I took forward as a novice cross dresser (or transvestite if you prefer), I would fall back two steps by doing something wrong. If I had the appearance of the presentation down perfect, then I would trip and fall in my heels which I was still attempting to learn how to walk in. To make a long story short, confidence was fleeting because this was the portion of my cross dressing life when I was still trying to dress too sexy and it turned out to be just trashy. I was learning the hard way to dress for other women, which allowed me to blend in and not cause unwanted attention.
When I arrived at the point when I began to effectively blend in, I became more grounded with my feminine presentation. When I did, I was able to gain more confidence and then attempt to communicate in the world as a transgender woman. Sadly, my new found freedom was so fragile, I could lose it without much warning. I was always ready for pushback from the public. With someone laughing at me or worse yet inquiring which gender I really was. If the truth be known, I still feel the same way today…
